enough

The all-sufficient one...El Shaddai...The Lord is enough

For Abraham in Genesis, the Lord was enough.  He was the "pourer forth," the one who pours himself out for his creation (noted from Lord I want to know You, Kay Arthur).  His Grace is sufficient, He is enough.  This is what the Lord has been teaching my heart these past few days.  No matter what comes our way, no matter the day and hour, He is all sufficient...enough.

When I am honest with myself, like I was yesterday, I know I am not acknowledging the Lord as enough.  There are things I want, things I don't understand, things that hurt.

As a child, I always wanted to be the mommy to my dolls, stuffed animals, to anything.  I'm a nanny.  I was a early childhood major in grad school.  It's obvious I love children.  Right now, the one thing I was ready for, wanting, thought might come a little easier, is not.  About a month ago, I was referred to an Infertility Specialist.  Disheartening, yes.  Encouraging, maybe.  A test of faith, absolutely.

Maybe we'll get pregnant, maybe not.  But at the end of the day, I hear my Savior asking, "Am I enough?"  Yes Lord, whether you open my womb or not You are ENOUGH!

As I stumble down this new road, new path for our lives, I'm grasping hold of the verse that always comforts my heart:

"You are my servant, I have chosen you and not cast you off";

fear not for I am with you,

be not dismayed, for I am your God,

I will strengthen you, I will help you,

I will uphold you with my righteous right hand."  ( Isaiah 41:9b-10)

God's righteous right hand refers to Jesus...I want to be upheld by Jesus, the perfecter of my faith.  God hasn't promised to open my womb, to bless us with children, to make life easy, but he has promised that He will be with us every step of the way...rejoicing with us and suffering with us and at the end of the day, that is more than ENOUGH!

{reposted from 11/05/09}