I have a bit of a give too much personality and then get super frustrated that no one is taking care of me. If I'm honest, it's just a sign that I need to start taking a bit more care of me.
I really do adore motherhood, even the not so fun parts, but after Meghan arrived I realized just how sacrificial motherhood can be. And while I'm all for sacrificing, I'm also all for making sure the sacrificer is well tuned as well. Life with two little ones caught me off guard a bit. I lost a bit of my mobility during the day, I get out less because Meghan won't take a bottle, and as an introvert there's just less time, less quiet, and fewer opportunities to recharge. It seems just as one falls asleep the other wakes and my daily temptation is to whine, stomp my feet and bang my head on the wall because I just need a bit of breathing room.
Alex often is the one to speak truth to me. The outsider who can see just what needs to be done. He's never failed to offer up any option to make the hard days easier. He's open to just about anything...going back to work, putting the kids in daycare/preschool, cleaning service, babysitters, you name it. Because most of all he wants a fulfilled and less stressed wife. Happy would also be a bonus.
Last month he told me flat out to stop martyring myself. But that's what we good mothers often believe. That we have to give and sacrifice, and put everyone first before ourselves. But I'm still not quite certain that's true or really even good for anyone.
So while I know I'm in the trenches with our youngest still under one, but we've been planning and putting into place some things to help make life better for all of us.
Meghan under went a frenectomy the other day for a very significant tongue and lip tie in hopes that nursing and taking a bottle may get easier. After 24 hours things are markedly better. Elizabeth is signed up for two morning preschool for the fall. Right now she's in childcare for MOPs and BSF so it won't be any more time really for her and the bonus will be that she will have more consistency. I'm still debating what I will do but I may just find joy in having 2 mornings alone with a napping Meghan to spend taking care of our house and myself. We enlisted the help of a cleaning service once a month to help keep tackle the deep clean items. And I've been trying to pull back and really focus on my New Years goals which really have made things better.
Even just our short night out last night as a couple to enjoy some good food and jazz helped me de-stress. And I've finally come to realize that putting myself and my marriage at the forefront really is better for all of us.
So I'm curious how do you take care of yourself?