Riding a Bike

It was around the time Elizabeth turned 2 and we were trying to figure out what on earth to give a 2 year old. After hearing so many raving reviews on balance bikes, we decided it would be the perfect gift. By the age of 2, she was adept at some things but using pedals was not her forte. So I input "balance bike" into google and happened upon the site "Two Wheeling Tots".

www.twowheelingtots.com

After reading reviews and trying to find a good deal we decided to buy a Strider brand balance bike off Zulily. We gave it to her for her birthday in June and of course all she could do was walk with the bike between her legs. But she faithfully practiced that for the rest of the summer and into fall and then winter came.

The next spring she gained confidence and began to glide. So much that by the end of the summer she was gaining momentum and was able to stay seated on the seat and lift her feet after getting herself going. We had read that balance is the first step to riding a bike and it proved true. By the next summer she was a bit big for her strider and we began hunting for the perfect first bike.

Again I turned to "Two Wheeling Tots" and asked advice, read reviews, learned about biking and made a decision. Because we have a petite sister ready to inherit this first bike we ultimately decided upon the Cleary Gecko. And for her 4th birthday she received her first big girl bike.

http://www.twowheelingtots.com/cleary-gecko/

When making our decision there were a couple of things that were important to us. We have the motto for our parenting that goes along the lines of "start how you want to continue". We wanted to get her off to the right step biking so that she would be confident and controlled going forward. We really wanted her to learn to use hand brakes from the start and to eliminate the use of a "coaster brake" (back pedal to stop). I had read enough in my research to learn that kids often back pedal to explore what riding is like and a coaster can frustrate young riders. This was true because while at some friends houses' she definitely got frustrated trying to ride the average box store bike. We also wanted it lightweight and for it to be her size so she grew in confidence. Also we did not want to rely on training wheels at all. Since she knew how to balance already, adding training wheels seemed like moving backwards.

The Gecko was just a smidge bigger than her balance bike but she started gliding just as she did with her balance bike, reached her feet up and off she went pedaling. That friends was worth the extra money and definitely made for an easier parenting moment. It's technically a 12" bike but was the perfect starter and will work great for her smaller and younger sister.

We absolutely knew that she would only get one riding season out of the Gecko so I managed to find it with a discount and it was money well spent. When researching bikes again for this next summer, I again reached out to "Two Wheeling Tots". Their expertise has been exceptional and extremely helpful. After sharing where we were at, hoping to skip a 16" bike knowing we wanted some longevity with this purchase, they led us to the Pello Reddi.

http://www.twowheelingtots.com/pello-reddi-pedal-bike-review/

The Pello is an amazing bike. It's a 20" bike but doesn't have gears since our 4.5 year old is a bit young for gears and they are un-necessary right now.  It has dual hand brakes and is an incredible bike. It's lightweight, sits a bit more upright, and lastly our daughter loves it. It's a bike you want to ride and it's extremely responsive.

I was able again to contact the company and secure a discounted bike. The one she has is a second...there were some tiny paint flaws but it saved us money. And now our family is able to head out the door biking the trails in our new neighborhood. We went out today and Elizabeth rode almost 5 miles with a smile on her face. She could get up the hills and control her speeds well.

I can't recommend Two Wheeling Tots enough. If you are researching or looking for bikes for your kids, reach out to them. It has made all the difference for our family. (And know they have bikes in all price ranges that they recommend.)

*just a little blurb on biking...we get a lot of questions and comments because she can bike so well already and thought I would share for anyone who cared:)*

To Elizabeth as you turn 4

Sweet girl, it is a true joy to be your momma. To think four years have unfolded before our eyes seems crazy. You often ask, "Mommy, can you remember when I was really little, like a baby?" And yes, I sure can. Holding your sweet little body and snuggling you in...I remember it like yesterday. That's why this business of you turning four seems so crazy and yet so fitting.

They say the days are long and the years are short and that's the truth isn't it? Some days are extremely long but these 4 years have gone by so quickly. It's been a joy to watch you grow and learn and develop just the way God saw fit.


Here's some things about you Elizabeth Mae that we don't want to forget.


1. You are the most sensitive, sweet, and full of love girl I know. The way you care for others and love deeply is overwhelming. You feel the emotions of others, you guard your sister with care, you love fiercely and more than that you know what true, genuine, Godly love looks like and feels like. Your expressions as you understand more and your jokes and silliness are so much more developed and refined. You have the kindest things to say and you love to build people up and remind them of Gospel truth. I'm often the recipient of your sweet encouragement when I'm frustrated or things are not going quite right and I'm thankful for your words. I pray you will hold fast to the truth and share wisdom with others in a kind and loving manner as you grow.

2. You are a social bug. The extrovert to our introvert. We've met more neighbors and people at the park and everywhere we go because of your love for people. I'll be honest, it's been a bit tricky for us to navigate, your daddy and I, but we are thankful for your love of people and desire to know and care for others. You've pulled us out of our comfort zones and we are thinkful for that but more than it being about us, it's been incredible to watch you when you are in your social element.

3. While you follow the rules, you have this tenacious, determined and stubborn side of you as well. You know what you like and what is right and what you don't and what is wrong. I pray we can lead you well in this area, showing you how to follow and lead with grace and truth. To humbly admit your mistakes while continuing to work hard towards your goals.

4. You faced your fears this year over and over again and are learning what hard work and determination can result in. Swimming lessons last year were a disaster but this year we cannot get you out of the pool and lessons have been a highlight of your day. It's a priviledge to be able to watch you push yourself and gain confidence in areas you were less confident in. You determination serves you well in this regard. Alongside learning to swim you have danced in your first dance recital, learned to downhill ski and ice skate, and learned to ride a two wheeler sans training wheels on the second try. It's evident when you are interested in something you are willing and ready to put in the hard work to give it your all. I'm grateful for your tenacity and willingness to try new things without letting others stop you.

5. You have your own unique sense of style and fancy. Lately you love picking out your own combinations of clothing and accessories and enjoy getting all fancied up. While you are equally comfortable in your play clothes and tennis shoes, you have an inner love for sparkles and dress up and fancy that is so fun.

6. This year you grew leaps and bounds in your understanding of God and the Gospel. Over Easter weekend, you, in faith, responded to the Lord's call on your heart to follow Him. It's been a joy to teach you and help you understand who God is and what sin is and the glorious thing that is grace. You loved Super Bible Club and AWANA and BSF. With gusto you dove in to learn and understand hard concepts and brought an abundance of questions our way that we were more than happy to attempt to answer. Sweet girl, we pray that you will hold on to the testimony of faith you proclaimed with all that you are as you grow and experience the years to come. It's our joy to walk alongside of you and point you to Jesus.

7. You love being with us. The joy and excitement that is on your face when you know all four of us are going to be together is truly a blessing. Add on grandma or nana or any other family member and you are on cloud nine. You revel in quality time and appreciate tradition. You enthusiasm to be together is contagious. I pray this will continue and you will always love being with your parents and your relationship with your sister will grow to be a sweet sweet sisterhood.

8. You love to sing. I'm so grateful for your sweet voice that sings hymns and songs and makes them up sometimes as well. It's a beautiful thing music and you have a love for it wherever we go. In fact "Holy Holy Holy", the songs from the church G.O.D cd, and a few others get literally belted out in shopping malls, stores, and the like. I love it. Dance parties are also usually to follow and your daddy and I love joining in.

9. You love to draw. This has developed more lately and we often find you out in your daddy's office with some paper and a pen making sweet drawings for your family. I love hearing about your pictures as there are usually intricate and detailed plots that accompany them. It's never just a picture for you. I pray you continue to enjoy being creative and as you create that you will see and know Creator God all the more.

10. You are a bookworm. You love to make up stories and read stories. You often sit in your room and "read" books before you fall asleep. Sometimes you even hide piles under your covers so we don't see how many you've pulled into bed. It's hard for me to disapprove as I was exactly the same way as a kid. Always my nose in a book. Praying this serves you well as you continue to learn and soak up knowledge. May books take you to a place of respite, give you comfort and teach you as you grow!

As your parents there are things we hope for and we pray for but most of all dear girl we pray that you would follow hard after Jesus all your days, not being swayed by what the world is whispering to you but holding fast to the promises in the word of God. We pray that you would fall in love with Jesus, knowing He's with you throughout your days, depending upon Him, looking to Him for your worth, and finding rest in His faithful arms.

Being your momma is about the best thing that's ever happened to me past following Jesus and marrying your daddy. It's my joy dear girl to spend my days with you. There isn't anywhere else I'd rather be.

Happy Birthday Elizabeth Mae!

letting life shine amidst the bathroom chatter

It seems like yesterday but in all reality it was over 4 years ago. That moment after we found out that we were expecting and I began to wonder about the sex of our baby. Inside I really wanted a boy. Mainly due to all those years of nannying boys and even more so out of fear of having to raise girls. And I began having dreams of a daughter. Then the writing was on the wall. Ballet pink splayed across the dining room.

It was then that every fear or anxiety I had about raising girls came at me like a blunt force. Me. Having girls. This grown woman with so many skeletons in the closet. Well not really in the closet, because most have come out to the open. But knowing what was in store for them. And more importantly, not knowing what was in store for them. What would childhood look like? And adolescence? And leaving the nest? Would they be bullied, or swayed by the sexy notions of the time or would they be the bully or the mean girl (please Lord no!)

All I could do and all I can do is pray. Well pray and help pave the way, right? I remember chatting over my fears with my husband and earnestly, almost as a plea, asking him to set our family on the offensive. Let's be on the offensive, right? See what's coming before it comes. Start the conversations before they are in the middle of it. Not get swayed by what the world is screaming. Not get swayed by what the church is screaming. Asking him to help me get swayed by what the WORD is screaming.

And then God gave me another little girl. And I felt a little like Sarah when she finds out she's pregnant with Isaac, laughing, in a sad and happy manner knowing full well that that which He has called me to, He will equip me for that work, even though it seems near impossible. Thank you Lord. Because raising girls, raising kids, that's work we cannot do without help.

And as any mother or parent or human being knows, what we do and what we say and how we act and how we love does not go unnoticed. It's why we can see ourselves in our best and in our worst playing in a motion picture right in front of us. The shortened temper, the kindness to a stranger, the cute and odd idiosyncrasies we all have, the joy in a beautiful day, the list could go on. And it matters what we offer up to them. It matters. Thanks be to God again that every single day is a new opportunity to do it better. To offer more grace. To show more love. To mess up and offer forgiveness. You get the idea.

Some mornings I wake up and the mercies don't seem new. I awake with the same attitude or mindset, only to offer it up again on the altar. Continually offering, well beckoning in my case, for more and more help. To raise these little girls in a way that offers the world as large of a piece of Jesus as our family possibly can. And boy do we get it wrong some days. But that's displaying the amazing work of grace and mercy. Free to sinners who fail.

That's the point right. Boy or girl. To love God and love others. To spread a passion for Jesus. And our words hold no sway if our actions aren't following right behind them. And then we start our day, we read the news, we begin to worry. We cast vision for our children, we want to mother hen the heck of them. To protect them. To keep them. To shield those little eyes. Right?

In these past almost 4 years of motherhood, I find myself consistently wanting to mother hen my girls. To keep them from my own mistakes. To shield and protect them. To not let them see or know or experience the evils the world holds. Just about a month ago I sat in bed reading articles on my phone...we're silly that way. And the two I read pertained to girls and social media. About how girls were beginning to give their bodies away to boys because they felt so much pressure to have sex that it was easier to just give in and get sex over with. Of boys asking for nude photos of girls to be sent via the kik app. So on and so forth. And my heart ached. God's good plan for sex...which is good and lovely and so fulfilling, so skewed and spent years too soon. My heart physically ached for the pain and hurt and damage that's being done to these sweet young girls. Ached. And I prayed for them and for my own sweet little girls to be guarded from sexual pressure.

Talk about sex, in an age appropriate way friends. Talk about it plain as day...about what the Bible has to say about how our kiddos are formed, who forms them, who loves them, how He made them and that all He's done is good. Remind them of their good good Father who has created them for His work. He's made them and us friends, to live a life that shines. To shine the light of Jesus.

And now the news of transgender bathrooms. Target's endorsement. The multiple petitions and chatter on how we should stand and fight and never shop at Target again. And I'm not making light of it. Believe me, as a momma to two young sweet girls, I'm not making light of it.

But I have been earnestly praying. For wisdom and discernment. For love to shine. Because friends, those boys and girls, men and women are struggling with their gender identity. They're made in the image of God. They're real people. And because of the sin that infiltrated the world we live in, because I'm using the Bible as my lens, they're confused and hurting. Some believe they were created to be homosexual, transgender, bisexual. But because again, I'm using the Bible as my lens, they were created in the image of God, as male or female. But sin, well sin frustrates God's good plan that He's bringing back to perfection. Soon and very soon.

As a family this past year, we've been studying the book of Revelation through Bible Study Fellowship. Revelation, as Elizabeth would sing,..."The Book of revelation says what God is going to do." Friends, it doesn't matter what your theology says about the book of Revelation. (although its great to figure that out.) The biggest takeaway from the book of Revelation is that millions of people will be swept into eternal darkness and despair because they would not denounce the world and follow Jesus. The biggest takeaway is one of Jesus greatest commands "Go and make disciples of all nations..." Go and live a life that shines for Jesus. That shares Jesus.

And with that lens, I'm reviewing the bathroom issue. I've got these sweet girls, friends. They're little and impressionable. And they watch. Oh dear, do they watch. They watch in the uncomfortable staring kind of watching. How will momma react? How will those people react? What is this world we are living in? How do things work? All the questions their little brains are trying to answer and put into perspective.

And here's my chance to pave the way. To start on the offensive. To lead them through this. And the only thing I keep hearing in the Word and in my heart is, LOVE. Love them. Show them how to love.

And here's the deal. As I see it, for the unforeseeable future my daughters will go to the bathroom before we leave. We will use a unisex bathroom as a group of three. Or friends, we will walk in that bathroom in twos or more. And we will look anyone we see in the eye and smile. We will offer kindness. We will not be scared or timid. We will not shy away from questions when they come if there's a male in the bathroom. We will confront them head on. Because this isn't new. This isn't new my friends.

Sodom and Gomorrah came down in an instant.

We happen to know those who consider themselves homosexual or transgender. We happen to know where they are at. We've been able to love them. Alex has share the gospel, he's used his friendship with these individuals to share the love. To let life shine for good.

It's not loving to boycott or never use a bathroom or never meet the issues head on for anyone. It's not loving to our kiddos not to talk about what's happening. What's going on. It's not loving to shame those confused or living life differently from ourselves. It's not loving to turn the other way in disgust or treat them as if they are all child molesters. It's hovering under the notion that removing ourselves will be easier or keep us safer or protect us or protect our kiddos.

I know we are called to protect our kiddos. I'm not deeming that silly. I'm not saying it's not important. You remember I've got two little girls. Two precious little girls. I would rather die than allow something hurtful to happen to them. And I know the idea of sexual predators in the bathroom is real. I'm not negating that allowing men to use the women's restroom and vice versa won't have adverse affects. I don't take any of those things lightly.

There are still options for us. Still good options such as single unisex restrooms. And from what I've read through Revelation and the New Testament, we've only got more destruction, more sin, more pressures coming as we take a stand for Christ. It's not magically going to get easier. We don't let the doors slam us down and hide in fear, we stand tall. We stand strong. And we love. We let our lives shine bright.

Because God's got us. He's got us. The God who created the entire world, who created you and me and millions of others, knows the hairs on our heads. Knows who is in the bathrooms in every part of the world. And He's still called us to love...to love and share and lay ourselves down and dump ourselves out for His glory.

Take this life and let us shine friends. And let your children join in.

"If the Lord wills..."

I I can remember the feeling I had in my heart after having gone on a couple of dates with Alex and him sitting with me at Dunn Brothers and saying "I think we should not continue dating."

I probably should have been heart sick or disappointed but instead I said "okay," and later left and called my dear friend. And to her I said, "He's going to change his mind...this is the guy."

I cannot say that the next day he called back with an alternate plan. He didn't. But months later, our paths again crossed and this time, as the Lord willed, we began dating. Not fairytale months of dating. Hard, prayerful, sin exposing and still fun and exciting if that's possible, months off dating. Until we were engaged and then married.

Somehow at that moment, after hearing his words, my heart was certain God would bring us back together.

James 4:13-17 reminds me that our plans are not ours, life is yet for a moment, the Lord holds the details and is totally in control. 

Because today we find ourselves with an answer to prayer that we began praying almost two years ago. Lord, if you will, help us discern where we should be. Whether we move or stay. 

When we started attending our current church it didn't take long for us to fall in love with the people, the teaching, the church. And we began to realize that if we really wanted to invest in the church and send our daughters to some of the charter schools we were looking at, that a move may be in store.

And yet, we just kept plugging along at updating our house. Not knowing where the Lord would have us. Thinking that the best solution was to stay. Pay off our house. Keep driving. We thought our roots were set in place but there was that back of the mind notion of moving that just wouldn't go away.

And here we find ourselves today, having prayed and negotiated and prayed and prayed, with a purchase agreement secured on our house and a soon to be builder agreement for a house much closer to our church and our church family.

I didn't have that same, we will move certainty like I did that I would marry Alex.  But we left the decision up to the Lord and He's shown us that moving is in our 

We can say today, with confidence, that moving, while bittersweet is exactly where the Lord is leading us. And we couldn't be more excited.

Through these years and months of praying and trying to take ourselves out of the equation, we've realized that our house isn't as important as we once thought. We are looking forward to building a house, but it will never be what we've created in our current home. It won't be as custom or as detailed. But it's a home, a beautiful home...one that's finished, that frees our family up to serve and give of our time to others. To our church. To family and friends.

Not to mention we are very excited to have more accessibility to being outdoors as a family. Biking, walking, playing at the park. 

So as the Lord has willed, we will move later this summer from our home in Bloomington where roots were starting to be planted to Victoria where those roots will dig down deep...unless, of course, He wills to move us again. 

What's inside your bag?

I rarely read blogs hear days but posts like this are always some of my favorites. 

I just changed out my bag for spring and once I saw all the contents I thought it would be fun to share. Mainly because of one little bag that's an addition to my purse, and it's a little bag I love!

Here's my new bag...a Pottery Barn Kids striped diaper tote I picked up during one of their latest sales for $15! Score!!

And here's what the inside looks like all packed up. 

Things I have with me at all times...my planner, my wallet, a pacifier, Meghan's diaper pouch and my new floral oil bag. 

I had a diaper pouch like this for Elizabeth when she was little. Monogrammed with her name just like Meghan's and it's perfect for nursery drop off and keeping things all in one place. The nursery workers love it because it has her name on it and it's not a huge diaper bag. It usually holds diapers, wipes, a sippy cup and a bib. I bought both of them at Pottery Barn Kids on sale. They are their normal wet bags so they are lined with a waterproof lining which is great. They double as a spot for wet bathing suits after the pool in the summer😉

Next I have my new oil bag from Red Fox Lane on Etsy. I can sew but I'd rather just purchase from someone else and have it done right away in this season of life😉 Just FYI this holds way more than oils. I have it stocked for a trip so there are more oils in here than normal. 

This looks small but it's a powerhouse. I have so much in here all organized because of the oil slots.

I have rollerballs, hand sanitizer spray, bug spray, sunscreen stick, lip balms, lipgloss, aquaphor, diaper cream, a pen, meds, bandaids and neosporin, nail clippers, and a Breathe vapor stick. There's still plenty of room for other things as well. It's like a medicine cabinet in a bag. Even if you don't oil I would recommend it!

Lastly my planner, my favorite wallet (Hobo Lauren), my small Bible and a pad of paper. There's a changing pad that came with the bag that I keep in here for traveling but otherwise I take it out.

So what in things do you have in your bag? Any favorites I'm missing??

One big decision ahead

The last time I posted I had high hopes of writing more often. But then, as it often does, life intervened and my plans were thwarted. These past few weeks our family has been mulling over and praying over the idea of moving. We've been searching and driving all over the west metro.

This isn't necessarily a new thing...but definitely more recent. The past year has been filled with thoughts of the future and preparing for some financial freedom.

Earlier this fall, Alex read through a book on creating a legacy by Dave Ramsey. We sorted through our affairs and made a legacy box. (A spot where all our important things are) While doing this we  also spent some time working through the future and preparing for the what ifs in case either of us were to pass away. He even created me a budget if the day came that he passed. 

And so this month we were/are preparing to pay off our entire mortgage on our current house. We've always lived a more wartime lifestyle because of Alex's profession and self employment, but some current work projects have blessed us. So much that we could pay off our mortgage now.

This step is the last step in our end of life plan as well. This step gives me the freedom to never work if Alex were to pass away. That's an incredible blessing.

But sometimes even in the midst of our own careful planning the Lord brings to mind a different path. And that path for us would be to move. 

To move closer to our church, our church family, give our girls sidewalks to ride bikes on and hike and run. To alleviate some of the "issue zones" in our current home that cannot be easily remedied.

We never thought that much about moving because financial freedom was on our brains. But we then contemplated the move and we could move to a beautiful new house and keep our current mortgage. Obviously not as custom as our house now, but the new house would back up to a pond...allowing the girls to ice skate in their backyard. It's a family friendly community, closer to church and the new house plan would remedy those current "issue zones."

It's definitely not an easy decision but it's a future that we feel drawn to. 

Pray with us?

We have already worked out a floor plan with the builder but they are working on getting a quote on some changes we've made to a plan. We are waiting two weeks or so to hear if it will work to build the plan with our changes and the costs associated. If everything comes back positively we will most likely put our house on the market. 

It's definitely bittersweet...as we love this house. It's where we poured out a lot of love, brought our little girls home, dreamed of their future. BUT...

It's just a house...our home is wherever we are together, right?

We've already made some minor changes to our existing house that we will enjoy if we don't sell but will get it ready if we do. 

Our basement was painted and our main floor bath got a very minor update, but one that really changed things up.

Obviously we don't exactly know what the future holds but we're anxious to see where God leads us and will be ready if He says move:)

Hemming Me In

Motherhood is not for the faint of heart. Nor is just being a woman who follows Jesus.

My life has been given it’s fair shake of ups and downs, bringing out my best and my worst.

I’ve known full well my areas of struggle, those spots tender to the enemy’s prodding. And it seems over time that slimy snake has figured them out as well. I’d blame the enemy or my children or my circumstances but I know right where the responsibility lies.

Like I tell my daughters daily, your mommy is a sinner. You are a sinner. Your daddy is a sinner. Everyone is a sinner. I realized the other day that I needed a change of definition when she posed that Nana and Papa couldn’t possibly be sinners because they don’t yell. And we began again, deconstructing sin.

We need to see our sin if we are ever to grasp the overwhelming grace from Jesus death.

That’s my area of struggle. Keeping my tea pot of a temper from screeching to a boil.

I’ve been a mother now for the past 3.5 years give or take. I assure you, there has never in my life been a period of time so sanctifying. The years of hemming me in.

There was a time in my life when I thought I had gotten my tea pot under control. And I guess I did for awhile. Until everything in my control was really not in my control. Nothing in motherhood is truly under my control. Well maybe the choice of lunch is. Or  whether or not my Bible opens.

But these littlest ones, the ones the Lord created for me to mother. ME to mother. He knows me better than I know myself and He still ordained for me to mother. These little ones cannot be controlled. Meaning they will not always do just what I want when I want them to for my comfort and my convenience.

That’s not really the meaning or intent of motherhood anyways.

They make my desire for order and cleanliness and introverted freedom a chaotic and beautiful mess. 

They boil the water in my tea pot.

Thank God they boil the water.

Thank God they hem me in.

Brings tears to my eyes that He loves me so much to give me these girls and for them to sanctify me deeply. For me to wear my heart on my sleeve. There’s no hiding from God. And there’s certainly no hiding from these little ones. They know who I am.

I’m not sure when I’ll get this water to just simmer and not boil over. Or even for the water to remain still. Never probably.

But there’s today, and the next minute. The next hour. The next part to pray.

Pray that God will help me keep my water below the boiling point. That He calm my heart. That 

these girls will obey their momma with the intent of obeying God.

Slowly but surely, because He said he would, God’s hemming me, in all the right ways.  A nip and a tuck and a gather. He’s bringing up the grime and removing the grit. Cutting it off.

Growing me closer to His image.

And as my daughter reminds me, because I remind her, every day is a new day.

New mercies are ours come the rise of a new dawn.

That’s true balm for a mothers heart and soul.

New mercies.

Sweet momma, girl, woman, daughter…God’s hemming us in to make us more like Himself.

He’s trimming the yuck for holiness.

Reminding myself to cling to new mercies. New chances.

Our days are filled with them.

Thanks be to God!

2.75 Years and 4 Months

It’s high time for an update. I’m still in denial that in 4 short little months Elizabeth will turn 3. In the past 4 months since Meghan was born she has gone from toddler to full fledged little girl and it’s been a joy to watch. And then there’s Meghan…already 4 months going on 5 and we are watching her grow, mature, and learn new things every day. Before we know it September will be here and she’ll be one!

Elizabeth at 2.75 years:

34.5 pounds, 39 inches tall, solid size 4 in clothing & size 9 or 10 in shoes, potty trained

Elizabeth, you are a joy to parent. Even when you are at your worst. You have an incredible memory probably due to the fact that you are very observant. You take in all aspects of the world around you. You love to be outside riding your bike and just enjoying God’s creation. You wish we could go to the playground every day! You LOVE to do art projects and create things and you are always singing. Your appreciation for music makes my heart soar and you sing, play instruments and we often hear you singing wherever we go. The addition of family dance parties at night have made your heart burst. with joy This year you go to Super Bible Club for MOPS twice a month and to BSF “church school” every week. You love to play with the kids there and always come home having learned something new. Next year you will be in 2 day preschool every week and I know you will enjoy the structure and open ended play.

You have so many of your daddy’s traits it’s almost uncanny. You try just about any food and love most of daddy’s favorites: olives, pickles, scrambled eggs, raw vegetables, sour things like lemons and limes, and candy. Other favorites include chipotle, guacamole, any rice dish, tacos/fajitas, colby jack cheese and sandwiches from Jimmy John’s and Potbelly. You are also an avid fan of milk, shakes, apple juice, and sparkly water (la Croix).

You are a great sleeper for the most part although you have managed to figure out how to extend bedtime! You sleep from about 7:30pm-7:00 am and take a two hour nap every day. You are a very good helper and want to be in on the action no matter what we are doing. Your favorites include cracking eggs, spreading things on bread, helping bake, and washing your own hair in the bath tub.

You are confident, have become far more sociable, and have a sensitive heart when it comes to others. You can share pretty well and hold your own when others are bothering you. While you can test the limits we’ve found it’s more for attention or to really see what happens. And my oh my, you say the funniest things. And lastly, you LOVE your sister. You run with gladness when she wakes up and you are always asking where she is if she’s not with you. I can only pray that the two of you continue to have a close relationship!

 

Meghan at 4 Months

14 pounds, 24 inches, size 3-6m clothing, size 2 diapers

Oh Meghan…I’m so glad you joined our family even though it’s far more chaotic and a good nights’ sleep has evaporated before our eyes. When I first found out I was pregnant I’ll admit I had my apprehensions but now at 4 months we’re through some of the hardest days and I couldn’t imagine our family without you.

While you are somewhat of a textbook baby, you have definitely had your moments of frustration. For awhile we thought it was colic/reflux/dairy, who knows, but after your frenectomy you are almost a new baby. You still have your moments but they are definitely fewer and farther between.

You, like your sister, love to be around other people. For instance yesterday we headed out with friends and you didn’t nap at all but then came home and slept for 3 hours. I’ll take it. While we’ve tried to get you in more of a routine you do tend to be pretty flexible when it comes to changes. You are at the end of a wonder week so sleep has been erratic and you’ve been waking more but mommy remembers this from Elizabeth so it didn’t throw me so much. We’re just riding it out and hoping more sleep in on the horizon.

You can roll from front to back and are on the verge of figuring out the opposite. You can wiggle your way across the floor…somehow. We haven’t quite figured out how you get where you do but you are always moving. You can lift your head really high and move toys back and forth between your hands. You love to jump in the doorway jumper even though you are a bit too small still.  You coo and talk and shriek all day long and love it when Elizabeth interacts with you and gives you snuggles. You are such a peanut and we love to cuddle you so much!

As far as eating…well that definitely has improved. The fix of your lip/tongue tie has definitely made eating easier and has made you happier as you are taking in less air. As far as bottles, you are still incredibly resistant which is killing me. You take a pacifier gladly so I haven’t quite figured it out. For now we will roll with it but we will definitely keep trying. I’m not sure you will ever take one because you definitely are more of a comfort nurser than your sister ever was. And that’s okay since you are our last…

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On the mommy front

Things are going well for the most part. I’m slowing down, trying to enjoy the little ones in front of me, and trying not to wish these days in the trenches away. Definitely grateful for new mercies every morning as I need them. And I’ve been finding ways to catch up on sleep and get in the me time that my introverted spirit needs. I’m just so grateful for these girls. When I think of the days ahead and our family, my heart just bubbles over at how good God was to give us these gifts to hopefully accompany us through the future.

In Search of Mommy

I've been doing quite a bit of thinking these past couple of months. Watching myself for signs of postpartum, taking note of where I'm at and most of all trying to communicate well just what I need.

I have a bit of a give too much personality and then get super frustrated that no one is taking care of me. If I'm honest, it's just a sign that I need to start taking a bit more care of me.

I really do adore motherhood, even the not so fun parts, but after Meghan arrived I realized just how sacrificial motherhood can be. And while I'm all for sacrificing, I'm also all for making sure the sacrificer is well tuned as well. Life with two little ones caught me off guard a bit. I lost a bit of my mobility during the day, I get out less because Meghan won't take a bottle, and as an introvert there's just less time, less quiet, and fewer opportunities to recharge. It seems just as one falls asleep the other wakes and my daily temptation is to whine, stomp my feet and bang my head on the wall because I just need a bit of breathing room.

Alex often is the one to speak truth to me. The outsider who can see just what needs to be done. He's never failed to offer up any option to make the hard days easier. He's open to just about anything...going back to work, putting the kids in daycare/preschool, cleaning service, babysitters, you name it. Because most of all he wants a fulfilled and less stressed wife. Happy would also be a bonus.

Last month he told me flat out to stop martyring myself. But that's what we good mothers often believe. That we have to give and sacrifice, and put everyone first before ourselves. But I'm still not quite certain that's true or really even good for anyone.

So while I know I'm in the trenches with our youngest still under one, but we've been planning and putting into place some things to help make life better for all of us.

Meghan under went a frenectomy the other day for a very significant tongue and lip tie in hopes that nursing and taking a bottle may get easier. After 24 hours things are markedly better. Elizabeth is signed up for two morning preschool for the fall. Right now she's in childcare for MOPs and BSF so it won't be any more time really for her and the bonus will be that she will have more consistency. I'm still debating what I will do but I may just find joy in having 2 mornings alone with a napping Meghan to spend taking care of our house and myself. We enlisted the help of a cleaning service once a month to help keep tackle the deep clean items. And I've been trying to pull back and really focus on my New Years goals which really have made things better.

Even just our short night out last night as a couple to enjoy some good food and jazz helped me de-stress. And I've finally come to realize that putting myself and my marriage at the forefront really is better for all of us. 

So I'm curious how do you take care of yourself?

Giveaway winner

On this super cold morning, picking a winner for the giveaway was a treat. Winning comment was #6, belonging to…

Crystal Bowers!

 

Random Integer Generator

Here are your random numbers:

6

Resolutions for the New Year

 

*Last day to enter to win the movie “The Promise”…enter here!”

discipline & intentionality

Today we spent the morning putting away Christmas and getting things back in order. The New Year always reminds me of the third trimester of pregnancy. Nesting instinct goes crazy trying to purge and organize. With all the chaos and mess and fun and joy of Christmas, the New Year always makes me want to put things back into order.

I’ve spent the past few weeks reflecting a bit on 2014…the year we started thinking we’d always be a family of three and ended as a family of four. The year of my last positive pregnancy test, my last pregnancy, giving birth to my last baby, the last newborn snuggles. So much joy intermixed with so much sanctification. There’s nothing like having a baby to show you who you really are. I remember so many years ago it seems praying as we waited that God would grove our family because we needed more sanctification. Truly I did. And we’re in it. Being more sanctified than ever as we face our full out selfishness. And now 2015 is beginning.

I’m not one to make resolutions because I know they won’t fully be fulfilled. Instead I just make note of some areas I’d like to improve on and leave it at that. On top of that for the past couple of years I have chosen a word to guide my year. In 2013 it was grace. 2014 was prudence. And 2015 is DISCIPLINE.

Since 2013 I can truly say that I have grown in the areas of grace and prudence. Maybe not enough for others to notice but enough to impact our little family and our home. And for 2015 I hope to grow in discipline. Particularly in reference to our home, to my mothering, and in being present. I’ve found this past year that there are so many times I just want to hide away. The first 6-12 months of having a baby are SO hard for me. Give me all your 2-4 year olds and I will happily enjoy them. But this two kid thing…it’s been a sanctifying and soul stretching endeavor. The lyrics “I need thee every hour…” have been sung in this house more than ever lately. I realized slowing down when I want to speed up and finish something already is just what the doctor ordered. My get out of the house and push through has been replaced with stay home and push through. I’ve had to reorder a few things, reconfigure normal, and to be honest, it’s been hard for me.

So in 2015 I’m striving for discipline and intentionality. Sometimes I find that I’m too spread out…too many things I want to learn about, grow in, and conquer that instead of finishing anything, they all get done half-heartedly. So I’ve narrowed the focus, honing in on what I really want to accomplish, and will be praying to that end. That the Lord will grow me in discipline and intentionality for His glory and for the good of my family and my home.

So here are some of the improvement areas I’m focusing in on:

The Girls

-memorizing verses with Elizabeth

-reading her Bible with her and praying with her

-creating a more structured learning/art time by planning in advance

-starting some chores around the house (with a chore chart)

-continuing to be flexible when it comes to Meghan and her “schedule” – something that is so different the second time (for the better)

-Get outside this winter every day that it is 30 degrees or above.

Our House

-get back into having a better cleaning schedule

-continue with my monthly meal planning

-have some restraint with purchases and be more discerning about what comes in

ME

-prioritize time in the word and finishing my BSF study. I have plenty of time to finish this but I happen to be the queen of procrastination and super good at finishing under pressure. Instead I’d rather find the time daily to do each day so that I can actually enjoy studying instead of rushing through it. My mentor is holding me accountable for this one and because I know what my days look like, I’m not giving myself the excuse that two small children make it difficult.

-get off my phone. I’ve decided phones are the stay at home moms way to zone out/catch a break. Enough said.

-start using my sewing machine again, read more, and learn about oils/use oils on a more regular basis

Family

-continue with once a month kid fun days

-dates with Elizabeth

-movie nights

-be intentional

-serve together. we are thinking of doing meals on wheels as a family and trying to participate as we can in the Big Serve opportunities at our church.

Marriage

-we used to go out and then we had another baby. go out more together and plan intentional time to spend together at home post-bedtime.

-pray together more often (a goal of both of ours)

A Christmas Recap & A GIVEAWAY!!

Another Christmas has come and gone and it seems like everything else lately it went by so quickly. In my mind it feels as though we just set up the tree, hung the advent calendar and began talking about the precious gift of the baby Jesus.

We started out the season by putting up our Christmas tree a bit early this year, on my birthday in November. It was so much fun as Elizabeth was finally old enough to participate and get excited. With our house decorated we began advent with Advent gifts (new Christmas pajamas and a new book to add to our collection.) I also wrapped all of our Christmas books thinking we would unwrap one each day but that only lasted a week tops. Someone in the house was too excited and couldn’t quite comprehend the “one a day” reality. In truth, it was nice to have them all open! Though we have a good collection of our own I followed Jenny Rigney’s advice and checked out quite a few from the library in advance.

I love that we are starting our own family traditions…things to look forward to as a family. We didn’t do something everyday and I definitely didn’t plan themed activities. We’re still working on getting this two kid thing down. But we did do some. We did the Advent Box, worked through our felt advent calendar, lit advent candles, read Christmas books, had movie nights every Friday night through Advent (more on this in a bit), celebrated the life of St. Nicholas, made Christmas cookies, read through Ann Voscamp’s Advent book (which I’m sad to say I didn’t really enjoy), and had a few fun friend outings.

This year we spent Christmas in Minnesota and it was our first Christmas Eve at our new church. They have a time during the service when they invite all the kids up front…which is a LOT of kids and I took Elizabeth down. I wish we had it on tape but after she sat for a few minutes she proceeded to take a tour of the stage, weaving through all the kids. There were so many people so I wasn’t able to grab her but she eventually made her way back. It was so stinking cute!

While all the traditions are fun, I loved how this year Elizabeth really caught on to the meaning of Christmas. She knew who it was about and what happened. Throughout Advent we spent each Friday night watching a Christmas themed movie. We started with Veggietales Legend of St. Nicholas on the eve of St. Nicholas day. We also enjoyed A Charlie Brown Christmas, Winnie the Pooh Christmas, and two Nativity themed movies. In years past Alex and I have watched The Nativity on Christmas Eve so I was on the hunt this year for a good nativity film aimed at kids. We were blessed to receive two to review on the blog from a friend. I actually bought one of them before we were given the ones to review so I have one to give away to one of you!!

The two nativity films we viewed were The Promise and Greatest Heroes and Legends Nativity.

Here’s my review of The Promise:

This came recommended from a dear friend whom I highly respect and it did not disappoint. Elizabeth is only 2.5 so she had a bit of a hard time sitting still for the movie which could have been due to plenty of different things. It should be noted unless she’s watching Super Why, it’s difficult for her to sit through any movie. But this movie, from a mom and dad perspective ,was pretty accurate, very entertaining, and thoroughly enjoyable to watch. It feels a bit like a Pixar film in terms of animation and most of the movie is done in song, similar to Disney. The film follows the Biblical account of the birth of Jesus pretty accurately and starts by showing the oppression of the Israelites by the Romans. It then portrays the budding love story of Mary and Joseph which is so touching. One thing I really appreciated about the film was tender way it portrayed the family relationships. It was very endearing. Everything was really well done and it was hard to remember that we were watching a “Christian” film if you know what I mean:)

One of the reasons I think it failed to hold Elizabeth’s attention is due to the fact that most of the movie is done in song. But I can tell you that next year she’ll probably be all over that and will be catching on to all the songs. It was such a well-made film that I’m glad to have it in our film collection and will be delighted to pull it out year after year on Christmas Eve as a new tradition.

And as far as the Greatest Heroes and Legends Nativity:

Well that one surprisingly kept the attention of our 2.5 year old while not quite capturing the attention of dad. Alex watched this one with her one afternoon and so I’m taking his opinions for the review. The story was somewhat accurate, the nativity included the visit from the Wise men which really didn’t happen until some years later. Also this was more your average “Christian” movie. The animation was far more dated and choppy, the songs and commentary were a bit distracting to adults but Elizabeth didn’t seem to mind them, and there is a longer commentary in the beginning by Charlton Heston which we forwarded through. Overall this was also a great option for viewing the Nativity story and is by no means a bad choice for Christmas. It is fairly accurate, held the attention of our daughter, and told the story of Jesus’ birth which when it comes down to it, is all we were looking for.

So there you have it – two new movies you can try out next year during the Advent season or on Christmas Eve like we do at our house! We really enjoyed The Promise and we’d love for your family to enjoy it next year as well.

TO ENTER: Leave a comment with your favorite Christmas Tradition!

giveaway ends 1/5/15

*This film was bought by me for the giveaway. I did receive two movies from Fish Flix for the review*

 

Merry Christmas

2014

the year of small but significant moments as a family

our days were spent shaking our heads in amazement that our family was expanding, cuddling our second daughter Meghan Joy (9/25/14), dancing to the music at the farmer’s market on Saturdays, eating the best bismarks from Sunrise Donuts, enjoying lazy days at the pool, celebrating Elizabeth’s 2nd birthday, building sand castles at the beach, stomping our boots through the rain and the snow, washing mud covered hands from overhauling our yard, wearing ear muffs at mealtimes as Alex renovated our kitchen, teaching Bible verses and singing Jesus Loves You, rocking babies to sleep, reading story upon story, celebrating 8 years of marriage relaxing with friends and family, climbing all over the playground, walking around the block picking up leaves, wiping tears and issuing discipline, being sanctified, playing multiple rounds of golf, laughing with girlfriends, wondering what on earth we were doing…the list could go on.

because for us these little moments throughout our days were creating the life we always longed for…

the life as a family.

Merry Christmas from our family to yours!

{if you received our card, please excuse the spelling error. the first set of cards had a spelling error and the second set had no errors but was too wide for the card. I’m obviously sleep deprived!}

Life Lately

I have a feeling from now on posts will look a lot like this. To be honest, I’ve started using Tumblr to share highlights of the girls with our families and I love that I can upload pictures from my phone a lot faster than writing a blog post. So as a result this blog is getting a bit neglected. And let’s be honest, it’s the best time of the year and there’s no way I’m missing out on that.

BUT we have been up to some fun things.

1. Elizabeth is potty-trained. Hallelujah! It was a very painless and easy transition. We realized she could hold it right when she turned two and we were visiting a splash pad. So she’s been ready for awhile but we held off due to the new sibling piece. Happy to say less than a handful of accidents later, we’re in the clear. Cue the happy dance that we only have one in diapers (sans nap/bedtime for E)

2. We are on the hunt for a mini-van. Cue the happy dance as well. I’m sure I will feel like I’ve really arrived into motherhood when I sit in the front seat and drive my happy crew around. That last part was sarcastic because if you drove along with us at certain times (thank goodness it’s not that often) you’d hear Elizabeth screaming “Be Quiet” to her sister who’s screaming her head off. The other day at a stop sign I got it on camera and it is the FUNNIEST thing ever. We’ve had to be careful though because that big sister picked up on its hilarity and loves to communicate like that. So now you hear all sorts of “That’s not a loving or kind way to speak to your sister” even though our minds are crying…yes, I wish I could yell that out! HA!

But mini-van. We’re stuck between going for the Town and Country because they’re nice and less $$ and a Toyota Sienna. Alex is certain it’s an “Apple vs. PC-drinking the Kool Aid” type of thing…saying people have been brainwashed by marketing to believe one is really better than the other. I don’t really care what we get as long as it has leather seats. I’m so over cloth with kids. I already told him I didn’t need to be there to test drive, hoping he begins to believe that as he would like to test drive with all 4 of us present. Um, you crazy? Did you not watch the screaming children video I just took. Ha!

3. I’m excited for Christmas and yes, I’m excited for all the gifts my children will receive. Obviously I’m fully aware that’s not what it’s about, but if they’re going to get things I’m glad they’re getting what they are. I rarely buy a toy. In fact I’m having a hard time thinking of toys I’ve bought this year, so I’m ready for some fresh new things for them to play with. Myself included. We do the whole 4 gift thing (want/need/wear/read) and even then she’s getting art supplies and puzzles. Because our kids are so young and our family sticks to our Amazon wish list, they get things we “need.” Most of the toys they are getting expand imaginative play and re-stock our art cabinet. I’m sure when they get a bit older I’ll be all over the experience/membership thing, but for right now we’re good stocking our playroom.

4. This season is going by so FAST. I just dressed our little peanut into 3-6 month clothing. Little Megs is so teeny. She weighed in at a hefty 11 pounds and just hit the 18% for height. I love how different kids can be! She’s been the greatest. Seriously. I’m sure it partially has to do with the fact that I’ve been here, done this before. I can actually figure her out. I can read her signs. It all seems so obvious this time around. She’s such a mellow kid unless she’s tired…both my kids were that way so we’re protecting sleep as much as possible, which isn’t really all that possible but somehow it’s working out. I’m dreading the day we transition to the crib. The rock n play is amazing.

5. We planned our vacation for the winter and I am so excited. I know there may be pangs of jealousy but winter hasn’t been that bad yet, has it? Probably has. Alex says he suffers from SAD and who am I to argue:) Orlando because it’s a direct flight and there’s golf and a resort with a pool. That’s all we need…and my mother to join us of course. Looking forward to doing life somewhere other than home for a week because let’s be honest, that’s all vacation looks like with little ones along.

6. We’ve had our Christmas tree up for some time now and I’m loving this season of Advent and Christmas with our littles. Elizabeth is totally into the tree and the songs and the baby Jesus. We’ve managed to read most of the days in Anne Voscamp’s new book and although they may be a bit over E’s head they’ve been great for my heart. And we’ve made some cookies and declared Friday nights as Christmas movie nights. On tonight is Frosty or Charlie Brown. Haven’t decided yet! It really is the best time of the year. But now we need some snow!

So there you have it a little peek into our life as of late.

How’s your advent/Christmas/Holiday season going thus far? Favorite traditions?

Monthly Meals…An Update

We are into our third month of monthly meal planning and I’m back with an update. I’ve had a few people ask how it’s been going and so I thought I would check back in. To be honest, I think this “spur of the moment, cook by the seat of my pants” girl is fully converted. I LOVE it.

That last little phrase is one I really, honestly never thought I would utter. But as we’ve gone on I’ve realized a few things that happen as a result of my monthly meal plan.

-making dinner is less stressful (note I didn’t say NOT stressful. It’s witching hour, y’all)

-we save money (because I’m not buying things haphazardly and then wasting them)

-we waste less food (our refrigerator is SO empty at the end of the month…it’s great!)

-it still allows for flexibility (we keep at least two days/week open)

-you grocery shop less (this one actually makes me sad because I adore grocery shopping but with two littles in the cold winter, it’s actually a bonus)

The first month we planned our menu for the month was the month following Meghan’s birth. We were blessed by so many incredible people and were brought so many delicious meals that I only had to make a handful of things. The bonus was that many of the meals could be postponed until November. So we’ve now successfully finished our first month and I just did the shopping for December. Yesterday the girls and I hit up Costco and Target for our staples and monthly needs. After this one big shop of the month I tend to run to the store once a week to replenish things like milk and get other things that may have been missed.

I’ve found that by spending a couple of hours before the month begins to plan the menu and walk through our kitchen with my master grocery list, circling what we need, has been so helpful. I have a list of 45 or so of our favorite meals documented that I pull our menu from. That way we  start each month with a stocked kitchen, meaning any meal on the menu for the month can for the most part be swapped for another (unless some random ingredient is needed). Plus it allows for me to plan our menu with grouped items. For example, if I have the menu planned out I am far more likely to reuse a leftover or ingredient and remake it into something else because I’ve purposefully planned a meal that sounds good. Also we have a leftover night planned into our week…usually Wednesday or Thursday. We are not huge leftover fans in general so whatever I make Monday/Tuesday is usually what is up for grabs later. I plan for this. Tonight I made this amazing Potato Leek Soup paired with a salad. Wednesday it will get paired with paninis and then be gone. Makes me feel better especially if I don’t want to or can’t eat it for lunch the next day. And the menu is posted in one of our cabinet doors so I can always reference it.

Since I’m usually an impromptu cook and we like to randomly go out as a family I worried that we would waste food. But I’ve found the opposite to be true. Because there are so many options for the month and we have two nights that I don’t plan meals for we can easily move and rotate depending on our moods. I’ve already swapped things because we had the ingredients or didn’t have them. It’s super flexible.

Also did I mention I’m less stressed during the most stressful part of the day. Seriously. I used to try and menu plan by the week but to be honest, it was just more of a headache because we’d miss meals, waste food, etc. Not too mention that every week I had to sit down and plan things out. Now I only have to do it once, I have most of the ingredients in the house for almost all of the meals, and the recipes I’ve been using are our favorites and are pretty tame in terms of prep/execution. I’m pretty certain Alex has enjoyed knowing that dinner is on the table, usually hot, and I’m not calling him to pick something up on the way home.

So there you have it. I’m a monthly meal planner convert.

And I LOVE it!

thoughts on my birthday

Today I spent the beginning of my 34th year putting up our Christmas tree. I think this is a first for me on my birthday…a head start due to Thanksgiving travel and Advent starting the day after we return.

And it was quite possibly one of the better birthday’s I’ve had of late. My amazing mother in law had taken care of Elizabeth a few times over the course of the past week including yesterday afternoon so Alex and I could do just what I wanted. Run errands. Seriously. I chose in good conscience to run errands with my husband coffee in hand. And to be honest, I can’t recall the last time we did that. Window shopped, sipped coffee, did a few returns and bought a few fun things. It was fantastic.

I’m tempted to write “that’s what life has become…running errands as a birthday wish” all full of fun sarcasm and yet I wrote it and deleted because it’s not true. I was reminded this morning as I awoke to silence and the heard the littles awake, how much I’ve wanted this life. This life where on your birthday you run errands because the days are so full loving on littles.

I’ll be honest…the almost full day break, the sleepover, and the afternoon alone with my husband gave me plenty of time away from those girls but my heart ached for them to return. That’s the way it is as a mommy.

And so, on the eve of my birthday I sat on the counter with Elizabeth sharing a bowl of pasta because I hadn’t eaten dinner far later than she should have been awake. And we spent today making a royal holiday mess in our house because we had to examine and talk about every thing we brought out of the boxes. And I’m so glad I chose to slow down today.

To enjoy all those little stops and starts without any agenda for the day other than getting Chipotle for lunch because we have no food in our house. And God showered grace upon me because Meghan slept the entire time at the restaurant, our newly potty trained 2 year old told me she had to use the bathroom and we made it in time, and our lunch was delicious, not too mention the company in which it was eaten was fantastic. I mean how can you not love a 2 year old that looks at her half of the burrito bowl and says, “chipotle, get in my belly.” (side note…a burrito bowl with a tortilla on the side is the best bang for your buck. I love burritos but the bowls are easier for e to eat so it’s a win, win.)

A good friend reminded me today about how grand this life I’m living is. Just four short years ago I truly believed I’d never be a mommy. And now this. Mess and chaos and chocolate ice cream dripping down chins. Discipline mixed in when things don’t go quite right.

This was a random array of thoughts, but I don’t want to forget today. Because it was one of the best birthday weeks, not to mention actual birthday, I’ve ever had.

I’m going to blink and before I know it more years will pass…just as I was reminded when I posted a picture from my 21st birthday 13 years ago on my sisters facebook page. 13 years ago. So much has changed and yet it feels just like yesterday.

blink and life passes by.

andrea, don’t let the minor things get in the way of embracing those littles and loving them fully. you’re going to blink and life is going to pass you by. put your phone down. don’t worry about capturing the perfect shot. just take it all in. observe and treasure. and join right in.

Why Meghan?

Evelyn.  Catherine.  Isla.  Adelaide.  Meghan. 

Names leading the way throughout the process of naming our girl. This time around choosing a name for our second daughter proved far more difficult than we imagined. Almost everything we liked the first time around, wasn’t a great option this time.

We did a similar post on Elizabeth’s name and I thought it would be nice to have a similar post for Meghan.

We are very aware that once upon a time, not so long ago, Megan was a VERY poplar name. Thankfully the number of women Alex and I know with the name is not that many. So when we began paging through the name books, Meghan was an early contender that caught our attention. We had some criteria that we used for Elizabeth and most of them hold true for Meghan as well. Here they are:

1. Traditional & easy to pronounce & spell (our last name dictated this point)
2. Has nickname potential but we like the given, full name
3. Can stand the test of time…not childish or juvenile
4. Has meaning
5. Not a family name

Meghan actually has been around for quite awhile as a pet name for Margaret but only has become popular in the mid-20th century. We loved that it was traditional, easy to pronounce and spell (although she’ll probably always have to say Megan with an “h”!) and is NOT at all common for babies right now. When we named Elizabeth her name was around 40 or 50 on the top 100, the year she was born her name moved to the top 15:/ Meghan is so far down the list that I’m sure it won’t make a come back any time soon.

Like Elizabeth, Meghan has some British ties. While this was not a prerequisite since we love Great Britain, we love that our kids hold some tie to that love as well. Meghan is a popular welsh name.

Meghan definitely has nickname potential…we call Elizabeth “lizzie mae” from time to time and we have definitely started calling Meghan “meggie joy.” Liz and Meg seem like great names for sisters to have:)

As far as meaning, well Meghan for the most part means “pearl.” And she is our pearl of joy. I take it one step further and think about what comes to mind when I think of pearl. For me a pearl is something rare, precious and unexpected because not every oyster has a pearl. For us, Meghan is our rare, precious, and unexpected joy because she came as a very much desired surprise.

And of course, for us Meghan is not a family name.

I love hearing how others go about naming their kids. It’s fascinating and I’m incredibly curious.

So, how do you go about naming your kids?

I love hearing how parents come to name their kiddos…any criteria you have in naming babies?

Recently I’ve Been…

 

Making: Cotton ball snowmen and lots of warm apple cider. I love apple cider and Costco has some of the best for just $3.99. Elizabeth is really into crafts so we’ve had lots of fun creating and coloring. Yesterday we spent part of the afternoon gluing cotton balls to paper…always amazes me how the simplest crafts can make the littles so happy. Between play-doh and paint our new little art space gets quite a work out. I can’t wait for her to open her arts and crafts box for Christmas!

Cooking: Scrambled eggs? That’s Elizabeth’s favorite breakfast and if we don’t offer it she’ll barely eat anything. But as for our family, well…the amazing kindness of new and old friends was incredible. We had meals a couple of times a week for the past month or so, so I’m just getting back in the groove. Last night we roasted a chicken and today Elizabeth is at a Nana sleepover so I’m thinking we won’t be cooking much.

Drinking:  Apple cider and Lime La Croix. And the occasional glass of red wine.

Reading:  Mountains of library books and the Read-Aloud Bible Stories by Lindvall. In my attempt to make Bible reading an everyday occurrence these books are great. Wishing I had time to read fiction or anything that wasn’t mail or child-oriented, but it will come.

Wanting: To not wish these days away. I’m not a “baby” person so this time has been a bit stressful for me but I don’t want them gone. Trying my darndest to breathe in every moment as I know she’s our last.

Looking: so forward to seeing my family for Thanksgiving and enjoying the holidays as a family. I love this time of year and it always brings me a lot of joy.

Playing: Tea party with Elizabeth (the girl could pour coffee and bring me tea for hours!) and Motown on Pandora. Seriously Motown always puts a smile on my face and I love dancing along with Elizabeth.

Sewing: Ha…no time for that:)

Contemplating: This new season of life. I knew when we moved churches last Winter that it would impact my friendships. But honestly the change that accompanies moving churches and meeting new people has been one of the hardest things of these early days with two. I really have missed my friends, my good friends, because we all have new schedules and the times we had cemented in to see each other (Bible study and Small group) just are not a part of our routine anymore. It’s life and seasons change, but oh how I miss them. All that said, the new friends I’ve met have been so loving and gracious so that has been a blessing.

Enjoying: the silence when it happens and solo time with each of our girls. Snuggling with Elizabeth when Meghan is sleeping and vice versa are life giving to me. It’s been a bit harder for me honestly to bond with Meghan but I know the days are still early and it will come, especially as she continues to grow.

Liking: the change of seasons and the fact that Christmas is on the horizon. I’m also loving watching both girls grow. With the arrival of Meghan it seems Elizabeth just totally grew up. And most days I like the rhythm of our life. Oh and how great my back feels after an adjustment at the Chiropractor…nursing and carrying babies and all that goes along with it is no joke.

Wondering: How moms with more kids do it. Some days I look around at our mess of a house and wonder when I’ll get back into a groove and get my act together. And then I remember just to keep giving myself grace…it’ll come.

Hoping: That one day all the clothes in my closet will fit again and I will be able to wear more than one pair of pants that I just bought in an entirely different size. Slow and steady…just being honest.

Marveling:  still at the fact that we have two girls. This is our life and we’ve said it to each other so often that our family now feels entirely complete. God definitely has a way of working all things for good.

Needing: the sermons our Pastor has been preaching on relational intelligence. Seriously…I’ve got so much work to do on being a better friend, not putting my foot in my mouth, etc.  A good season of being refined.

Wearing: Whatever I can find that fits and looks semi-decent. And loving scarves…perfect for nursing and make me look semi-presentable.

Following: my niece and nephews on Instagram and daily laugh out loud at what they are posting. Makes me feel so near them even though they are 5 hours away.

Smelling: The cinnamon scent of Thieves because we’ve been applying it liberally to keep colds away. Still loving our oils and hoping they continue to help ward of the sickies.

Noticing:  The amount of time I spend on my phone and am trying to desperately remedy that.

There you have it, a glimpse into our day and our life. Here’s the best of the best pictures from Meghan's dedication this past weekend. Seriously…one day we’ll all look at the camera!

(and yes, I purposefully dressed us all to coordinate. It’s a sickness I tell you!)

It’s on Sunday’s I remember…

“You call me out upon the waters
The great unknown where feet may fail
And there I find You in the mystery
In oceans deep
My faith will stand…”

Those years past I didn’t know what He was doing. He called us out, asked us to walk in faith, our infertility and loss a mystery. And yet, even as He called us out and walked with us, He allowed our faith to stand.

And it’s on Sunday’s I remember you most often. As I stand in worship at church, thinking and heart swelling, that we are singing in unison. You and me. Though I never touched you, never smelled your newborn scent, never sang to you…it doesn’t really matter, because when I open my mouth in praise I know I join you in the heavenly chorus.

“…Your grace abounds in deepest waters
Your sovereign hand
Will be my guide
Where feet may fail and fear surrounds me
You've never failed and You won't start now…”

The Lord created you both with purpose and He took you both home with a purpose. That I am sure of. And I know had you come, your sisters would not have. And had you not first made me a mother, I may have never mustered up enough hope to think He could create life again. His grace abounded when He gave you to us, even just for mere days. His hand overflowed with blessing and though my feet began to slip and I feared it would never happen again, the Lord you stand before and worship never failed your mother when He took you home.

He was faithful. I look at those pregnancy tests that told me I was a mother when the lines intersected and I think of you and who you would look like and my heart overflows with thankfulness that He showed His goodness when He gave us you. To think, I am the mother of four children; two in front of me and two I can only hope to meet.

“…Spirit lead me where my trust is without borders
Let me walk upon the waters
Wherever You would call me
Take me deeper than my feet could ever wander
And my faith will be made stronger
In the presence of my Savior.”

When your daddy and I began trying for babies we asked the Lord for children because we knew we needed sanctifying and because we wanted to raise up children for the Lord. Little did we know that in praying and asking those things, we would walk a road neither of us could have imagined. Years of treatment and uncertainty, two babies lost too soon, and then two babies given to life here on earth. When He called us to walk the road of parenthood, He took us deeper and our faith was made ever stronger.

And though I would love to stroke your cheek and kiss your soft head and tuck you in and give you a name, I wouldn’t take back the years the Lord gave us in knowing Him more. Because I know that where you are is where you were created to be.

And it’s on Sunday’s I am with you again. As I sing out in praise I know my voice is joining yours as we worship our Savior together. You and me. He has not left me without a chance to be with you, for in worship our hearts are knit together. The only difference is that you are standing face to face with Him who has given and has taken away.

So it’s on Sunday’s I remember you.

{in remembrance of the two babies the Lord gave us for a short time in honor of October 15th…Infant Loss Awareness Day.}

**lyrics from Hillsong’s Oceans**